It’s Time to Stop Dissing Vodka

If I had a nickel for every time someone said “I like everything but vodka,” I could do a load of laundry (which, at $1.50 a wash for my building’s machine, is a lot of nickels). People love to hate on vodka. But really, what has vodka done to you? Showed up in a few mediocre vodka crans that you yourself ordered? Perhaps dressed itself up in vanilla and splashed into a Diet Coke? Vodka’s just trying to get you loosey goosey, and you pay her no respect.

I guess we should go back to where it all started: the early aughts, when bartenders rebelled against the awful cocktail culture of the ‘80s and ‘90s and made us all replace those Appletinis with Old Fashioneds. Thank god for the renaissance, really and truly. And I understand why bartenders removed vodka from their cocktail menus during this time — they needed people to step out of their comfort zones and try something new. A perfectly executed Manhattan. A gorgeously sweet-tart Daiquiri. Our old friend the Sidecar. But the thing is, we’ve made it! Cocktail culture is booming. Hell, we’re paying upwards of $20 for one single drink. Shouldn’t we welcome vodka back to the party?

Where Are All the Savory NA Cocktails?

Non-alcoholic drinks have come into their own, but one crucial category is missing from the menu

Many bartenders feature vodka on the menu in excellent cocktails. It’s the star of my favorite drink at Superbueno, the Vodka y Soda. It gets infused with tomato and basil in Jac’s on Bond’s perfect Caprese Martini. It’s even in the very cool and very popular Draped Up at Denver’s Yacht Club. So why are y’all avoiding it like the plague? I even know people who won’t drink Espresso Martinis because they’re made with vodka, just on principle alone. You can barely taste it in that cocktail! So silly.

Sure, some of you are scarred from the bottom-shelf swill you drank in college. Trust me, it took me a while to get back on the vodka horse after a particularly bad night. But that was an awful handle that probably cost $10, maybe even less. This is not the vodka I’m telling you to drink, but you definitely should give the well-crafted, artisanal stuff a chance. You might be pleasantly surprised at how nuanced and interesting it can be.

Everyone deserves a second chance, even the oft-scorned vodka. Try infusing it with dill and blue cheese, like Carrie Jones and John McCarthy do in their book Every Cocktail Has a Twist. Get over yourself and try it with coffee liqueur in a Black Russian. Drink a gross Moscow Mule, if you must. But whatever you do, don’t scrunch up your nose and say “I hate vodka” every time you cross its path. You’re hurting vodka’s feelings, and it’s really not nice.