In You Cannot Be Serious, John McEnroe’s memoir, the tennis legend writes: “My shtick, of course, was getting upset. Did it help me more than hurt me? I don’t think so…I probably would have done better if I hadn’t ever gotten into that.”
It’s a surprising admission from one of the greatest athletes of his era. Love him or hate him, many assumed McEnroe’s frustration was his superpower. But in hindsight, even McEnroe isn’t so sure: “[I] would have brilliant moments on the court, and total meltdowns. There was just too much going on inside.”
For the rest of us, non-elite-athletes, there’s a lesson in there: anger doesn’t work for you. If you regularly deploy it to win points at the office or at the dinner table, accept that you’ll have to pay a “meltdown tax.” And it’s not just your mental health that pays the price — over time, your body will feel the impact, too.
Think about this way: if you punch a wall, you just might break your hand. If you punch a wall every day, how would your hand ever heal? Below, we discuss how chronic anger sabotages the body — and offer some strategies for “releasing” it before it takes its toll.
Are You Any Good at Thinking for Pleasure?
We’re all terrified of being alone with our thoughts, apparentlyThe Health Risks of Chronic Anger
Uncontrolled anger has a long list of unsavory side effects. Think: headaches, indigestion, insomnia, eczema and muscular tension (especially in the neck and shoulders).
Chronic anger can even affect entire systems in the body — a study published in Immunology demonstrated that unchecked anger can suppress the immune system, which makes you more susceptible to infections and illnesses. This line really stuck out to me: “Individuals with below average levels of anger control were shown to heal significantly slower than subjects less disposed to this emotion.”
The key word there is “control.” It would be ridiculous to suggest that anger isn’t a real and valuable emotion in the human arsenal; the same study discusses anger’s advantageous role for our ancestors, priming their bodies before a fight. But we live in a different age — and slamming your hand against a laptop is not the same as battling a beast in the jungle.
When you’re angry, your blood pressure, heart rate and adrenaline levels are all elevated. This puts a massive strain on the body, and especially on the cardiovascular system. Angry brains are swimming in way too much cortisol, all the time. This can impact your sense of memory, concentration and decision-making…and perhaps compel you to do angry little things (like getting embroiled in a road rage incident), feeding a self-defeatist cycle.
How to Release It
All told, anger takes years off your life. And it will give you a worse one — with a heightened risk of anxiety, obesity and heart attack. What can you do about it?
For starters, as we said: don’t give up on yourself. Look within; find the courage to admit that living this way is less than you deserve (and likely, less than those in your orbit deserve, too).
Consider the ways in which you deal with anger; chronic anger isn’t only a result of repression. It’s also associated with “anger explosions,” or constant micro-incidents in which you yell, smash or stomp…to the detriment of yourself and others. This might feel like you have a normal relationship with anger (you’re expressing yourself, right?), but it’s missing that crucial control component. Anger can be felt and observed within oneself. It can be addressed, discussed and treated with certain actions, which stand to benefit your life in so many other departments.
5 Strategies to Try
1. Physical activity
Go for a run, lift heavy weights, punch a bag. This is anger at its most useful. We write more about the potency here.
2. Deep breathing
Breathing is the only autonomic operation in the body that we can actually influence. Done with intention, it can help you process anger.
3. Talking it out
Either informally (with friends or family), or in a professional setting (via cognitive behavioral therapy).
4. Timeouts
They sound infantilizing, but giving yourself a timeout is a courageous and adult action. It could manifest as a simple walk around the block.
5. Experiment
Find what works for you. Scream into a pillow, listen to music, journal, paint, talk to yourself. The key is to find the healthiest way of letting it out.
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