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In the seven years since I started working at InsideHook, I have accumulated a cabinet full of sexual wellness products. When you work at the intersection of sex and dating and commerce, this can happen to you. A few years ago, I embarked on a sexual wellness voyage, trying — at the time — about 30 different toys, lubricants and other sexual wellness items. Two years since my little experiment, that arsenal has only grown.
Despite the many wearable couples toys, clitoral suction devices and bullet vibrators I have at my disposal, I find myself only reaching for one type of toy: a wand vibrator.
The mother of all vibrators famously hit the scene in 1968. Originally manufactured as a muscle massager, the Hitachi Magic Wand became popularized as a clitoral vibrator during the sex-positive late ’60s. Fifty-eight years later, the Magic Wand is still at the top of its game (and now is available in cordless and mini iterations).
“A wand does what a sex toy is supposed to do. It gets people off,” says Annette Benedetti, sex and intimacy coach and the host of theTalk Sex With Annette podcast.
“The wand is powerful, effective and ridiculously versatile,” she adds, noting that the Wand has been around for almost 60 years and still outsells things with Bluetooth and app connectivity. “You can use it solo, you can bring it into partnered play and it works on all bodies regardless of anatomy. It slides into a vanilla Tuesday night just as easily as it fits into a full-on kink scene. There aren’t many toys that have that range. Sometimes the simplest tool is the most effective one.”
The wand has been able to stand the test of time due to a variety of factors: its design, its power and its accessibility.
“The wand-style design is still considered less explicit than many other sex toy shapes. It was originally designed as a back massager, and so it can still be claimed as one by anyone who feels shy about their vibes. They may rather call it a personal massager than a sex toy,” says Lisa Finn, a sex educator for Babeland.
Ultimately, it comes down to effectiveness, says Alicia Sinclair, sex educator and founder of Le Wand.
“Wands deliver deep, resonating, full-body vibrations that are incredibly effective at stimulating the clitoral structure — and that kind of powerful, broad stimulation is hard to replicate with other toy styles,” she says. “They also happen to feel wonderful on all kinds of bodies: vulvas, penises, muscles that need a little relief after a long day. That versatility is really the secret to their longevity. When something just works — and works for nearly everyone — it doesn’t need to be reinvented.”
Because that’s the thing: Like all vibrators, wands are typically associated with female pleasure. However, the same neural activity that allows a vibrator to feel good when placed on or near the clitoris is also present in the penile corona.
Take It From a Woman: You Should Let Your Partner Use Her Vibrator on You
Why should she get to have all the fun?“Vibration can feel great on any erogenous zone where you enjoy direct stimulation,” explains Finn. “For example, the perineum is a very nerve-dense area, and the powerful vibration from a wand can actually travel deep into the body to stimulate the prostate through the perineum, meaning you can enjoy P-spot stimulation without anal penetration.”
Its long, ergonomic handle makes it easy to maneuver, whether you’re going at it solo or having your partner drive the stick.
“The long handle is genuinely one of the wand’s most underrated features,” says Sinclair. “It makes it easy for people of all body types and sizes to reach their own body comfortably, whether that’s someone with limited mobility, a larger body or simply someone who wants more control and leverage. That extended reach also makes it easier to use on a partner, which adds to its versatility as a couple’s toy.”
As I’ve stated in the past, enthusiastic vibrator use during sex is one of the hottest qualities in a man. And not only is she more likely to orgasm (a win!), but you may unlock new sensations to experience a deeper, more intense orgasm for yourself (a win/win!)
“What men should know is that a vibrator isn’t competition. It’s a collaborator,” says Benedetti. “The wand fits between two bodies during intercourse, and that changes the experience for both people. This doesn’t get talked about enough: If you press the wand against the base of the penis during penetration, those vibrations travel through the shaft. She’s now getting internal vibration on her G-spot while he’s getting stimulation too. You’ve turned his body into a vibrating toy. That’s not replacing anyone. That’s upgrading the whole experience.”
Now, I’m not encouraging you to discard your entire drawer of sex toys. But if you are interested in a sex spring cleaning, know that you can downsize without sacrificing anyone’s pleasure.
“A wand is the most versatile option in the drawer,” Benedetti adds. “You don’t need to buy a separate toy for external stimulation, another for massage, another for foreplay. The wand does all of it. For couples who don’t want to build an entire collection before they’ve figured out what they like together, it’s the obvious starting point. One toy, endless applications.”
Endless applications and endless choices. If you’re ready to add the GOAT of sex toys to your nightstand drawer, peruse our favorite wand vibrators below.
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