Why You Should Send Men Flowers

I’ve received flowers once in my life. It was more than 20 years ago, and it happened after a weird fight with my then-girlfriend (alcohol was involved). The flowers themselves were unmemorable outside of two facts — they were from the same florist, and it was the exact type of bouquet I’d sent to my partner two weeks earlier in a more romantic gesture. But the lack of originality didn’t bother me. Just getting roses was such a shock that it took me a few minutes to realize, hey, I like getting flowers.

They smell good. They brighten up a room. And the gesture behind it — be it for love, an apology, general appreciation or even as a subtle dig to improve my home design game — is greatly appreciated. Somebody spent time and money to put together a very pretty thing and have it delivered. Swoon!

Honestly, I’m not sure why men don’t receive flowers. (I suppose I should mention I’m a cis white male if that makes any difference to you. I also like whiskey, football and punk rock. Throw your stereotypes away, people.) According to the online florist UrbanStems, 88% of men don’t receive flowers until their funeral. So at least I’m ahead of the curve.

I’m not alone in this wanting of flowers, at least according to the last popular social media site that isn’t toxic. To quote Reddit user “Fletcherperson” on r/AskMen, “I’ve given my girlfriend/partner flowers probably nearly 50 times in the 10 years we’ve been together, and she hasn’t gotten me flowers once. Where the fuck are my flowers?”

The Best Flower Delivery Services on the Internet

Anniversary, birthday, Valentine’s Day or just because, these online florists each offer up something unique in their bouquets

As usual, the corresponding comments offer insight and some comedic gold. As I learned, if I want flowers, I should (heavy finger quotes) “communicate” that with my partner. Some men apparently find flowers high-maintenance, which means these men have probably never had a real relationship or taken care of anyone or anything. Do nothing for these men. One woman complained that her husband pouted about not getting flowers and was thrilled to finally get some but left them on the counter for her to take care of. “Never again” she wrote, and I can’t argue there — if you want flowers, ask for them, show appreciation upon receiving and then take care of them. Put them in a vase and do whatever else the most likely included instructions tell you to do.

So, what type of flowers? Lucky for you, I write InsideHook’s guide to online florists. Pick something we’d like — match a favorite color or give them a bouquet that reminds them of a good memory. Unless we specifically ask, don’t get us edible arrangements because that shit is gross (cupcakes are an exception).

Also, you don’t have to do this for Valentine’s Day. Pick some less cliched time to send a guy flowers (and while we’re at it, stop sending us these male gift cliches). Just do it. As my man Fletcherperson says, “I’m tryna get that bouquet, homie.”