15 Gifts for the Sophisticated Stoner
'Tis the season to get absolutely baked.
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Stoners are complex individuals. Plagued by stereotypes of laziness and perceived as having a lack of motivation, they’re perpetually misunderstood. But the stoners of today are not solely of the Jeff Spicoli and Dazed and Confused variety, wayward teenagers still yet to embark on their lives. Rather, today’s stoners are often highly-functional and successful adults who just so happen to enjoy the frequent joint or bong rip.
Just as the stoner has evolved, so too have the means and methods by which they smoke or ingest the herb. Gone (hopefully) are the days of rigging an apple into a makeshift pipe or painstakingly cutting up a nug, as there now exists a wide market of high-end, aesthetically pleasing weed-related products — products that at first glance look like they have nothing to do with getting zooted.
So if there’s a stoner in your life (or someone you suspect is one), gift them something that will elevate the experience of getting baked, blitzed and blazed. Because if you can’t gift someone weed, at least gift them something that is sure to enhance the activity, whether it’s a pipe that resembles a sculpture or an always-reliable lighter. And who knows — maybe they’ll let you partake with them as a thank you.
Sackville & Co. Gilded Grinder
A grinder is one of the most important components in any stoner’s arsenal, so gift them one that’ll last them for years, while simultaneously looking like a Brancusi sculpture. Sackville & Co.’s Gilded Grinder features diamond-sharp teeth for a faster grind that in turns yield a finer dust, which will collect nicely in the wide, deep-set bowl at the bottom. Besides, this grinder is so nice they won’t feel the need to stash it away in the company of guests but will instead want to display it proudly.
Tetra Elbow Pipe
If there ever was a pipe that looked like anything but a pipe, it would be this one by Tetra. This delicate glass piece designed by Ninon Choplin of neenineen allows the user to watch the smoke billow inside with each puff, thanks to the transparent teal glass, and thus gauge just how much smoke they’re inhaling. While it might not be the most portable or smallest of pipes, the design allows it to fit easily in one’s hand, with a carb and upturned bowl on one side, and mouthpiece on the opposite.
Flower by Edie Parker Vanity Tray
For many potheads, rolling a joint is not just some annoying task, but an art. This glossy and sleek “marble” tray from Flower by Edie Parker will further heighten the sense of importance and ritualistic aspect that goes into crafting the perfect joint, while also serving as a nice piece of decor in one’s home.
Tanner Goods Herb Grinder
Precision machined from aircraft-grade aluminum, this grinder has specialized bushings to prevent metal-on-metal contact. Large threads make it easier to properly line up the parts and the three-part construction makes it easy to separate grinds. Magnet allows the grinder to stack up perfectly with Tanner Goods Canister.
Dad Grass Hemp CBD Preroll 5 Pack
While not actually weed, Dad Grass’s CBD joints will lend one the same relaxed and mellowed out feeling marijuana often provides, thanks to the 100% organic hemp used. It’s the perfect alternative for when you want to take the edge off, without fear of getting absolutely high out of your mind.
Malin+Goetz Cannabis Eau de Parfum
Marijuana is a potent fragrance that sticks, and if you know of someone that tends to walk around reeking of the reefer, gift them Malin+Goetz’s cannabis scented perfume. Think of it as a subtle way of telling them they smell a little too strongly of the herb, without robbing them completely of the smell. The cannabis scent is offset by floral notes and black pepper, creating a fragrance that’s earthy and just slightly reminiscent of the plant by which it’s inspired.
Save someone the agony of going to toke up only to find their lighter out of fluid with this rechargeable lighter from Tetra. Fuel free, just slide down the panel to reveal an electric coil that will instantly heat up.
Inda Creations Pipe Keychain
As unfortunate as it might be, the reality is you can’t exactly tote your bong around with you everywhere. But when you need to get discreetly high on the go, opt for this lil’ pipe keychain by Inda Creations. All you need to do is unscrew both end caps, pack your strain of choice into the hollow chamber, then light ‘er up.
Shine 24K Gold Rolling Papers
Yes, $40 is a lot for rolling papers, but these aren’t your run-of-the-mill gas station papers. No, these are 24K gold rolling papers and should thus be used sparingly, say for a celebratory or holiday joint.
Veil OG Odor Eliminator
Not everyone has the luxury of comfortably and freely smoking within the comfort of their own home, or maybe some just want to be respectful of those who choose not to partake. Veil’s OG spray is formulated to eliminate any dank cannabis odor, thanks to the powerful notes of sweet orange, cracked black pepper and Virginia Cedar. You’re room will smell so good and weed-free you’ll forget you even smoked in the first place (except for how high you are, of course).
Boy Smells Kush Scented Candle
Just because one might consider themselves a stoner doesn’t mean they necessarily want to get high everyday of their lives. Maybe there are days when they just want to be ever-so-slighly reminded of the scent, but in a more sophisticated manner. When that’s the case, allow the Boy Smells Kush candle to fill the void with a floral scent featuring subtle undertones of cannabis.
Eric Bonnin Spout Ashtray
It’s easy for a stoner’s space to devolve into a mess of ash and weed crumbs, but Eric Bonnin’s Spout Ashtray will allow them to keep things tidily chic. The rim notch is perfect for taking a break from hitting a spliff or smoking a doobie, allowing one to easily return to it whenever they see fit.
Upgrade those amateur weed brownies with Levo’s Levo II, the first infuser to streamline herbal infusion from start to finish, allowing one to infuse everything from salad dressings to scented candles. Who knows what kinds of cannabis cuisines some stoner will concoct with this bad boy?
Keeping one’s bud properly and safely stored is of the utmost importance, and Craighill’s Press Vessel is up to the task. Crafted from precision-machined anodized aluminum, it’s an airtight container that will keep everything from spices to herbs (hint hint) extremely fresh and insanely potent.
In the event one’s disapproving family members make an unexpected visit, this sculpture-esque bong can easily be passed off as a decorative vase. Just throw a flower in it, turn it around, and they’ll never know the difference.
Gossamer describes itself as a magazine “for people who also smoke,” with each issue containing interviews, conversations and essays, told or written through a “green lens.” Besides the wealth of content, the publication is also heavily populated with trippy and vibrant photos and artwork, perfect for gazing at with glazed-over eyes for hours upon hours.
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