There’s long been a discussion about what is the male equivalent of women being given flowers (see: this Reddit thread from 12 years ago). A decade-long debate with still no clear conclusion in sight? Pitiful! For some men, it seems it’s as simple as being given pizza or compliments. For others, it’s also just flowers. But for many men on TikTok, it seems that the answer is pretty clear: banana bread.
In a recent TikTok posted by @tre0ntiktok poses the question “Somebody made a post saying, ‘What’s the male equivalent to flowers?’ And somebody commented, ‘banana bread.’ Now when I read that, I was like, lowkey? That does sound pretty nice. And then the whole conversation agreed. That was the most universal thing I’ve ever seen.”
And it’s really true. His video got over 800k likes, the comments were flooded with eagerly agreeing men and the many other videos responding to this one have also gone viral.
“Who is on this app snitching about banana bread?” user @greekos_nikos says in this video. “It used to just be a thing that would happen sometimes. Whether it was romantically inclined or not, receiving banana bread, as a man, it mattered.”
To me, this makes complete sense. There’ve been countless times when I’ve been inspired to make banana bread after looking at the sad, browning bananas sitting on my counter. When I told my boyfriend about this newfound realization on TikTok, he quickly agreed.
At the root of it all, a gesture where you give your partner any physical object, like flowers, indicates you saw something that made you think of them and decided to get — or in this case, make — the said product to show your appreciation.
And when it has to deal with food? Sold. Don’t you guys know that women love it when you grill for them?
On an even deeper level, the appreciation for being given banana bread likely means more when it’s not just being bought, but when it’s being baked by your partner. It makes sense: It’s a thoughtful task, one that takes time and requires some creative crafting. It’s also kind of a safe-proof method to show someone you care when words don’t quite work. A lot of people consider baking a “love language,” if you will — it falls in line with acts of service by doing something that will make your partner feel good or even gift-giving.
It reminds me of another set of viral TikToks, where men were learning how to make their girlfriends and wives bouquets of flowers as opposed to just buying them from a store.
It’s the same idea — seeing your partner take the time to put something together for you from scratch is all the more meaningful. Picking the flowers, arranging the bouquet, cutting the stems, finding the right vase — it’s a thoughtful and concentrated series of steps just like baking a loaf of banana bread.
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