Please Don’t Succumb to the Jean Speedo

Shinesty recommends wearing them "paired with caterpillar-style mustaches for optimal results"

Shinesty
Shinesty offers denim-inspired swimwear. (Shinesty)
By Ariel Scotti / May 31, 2019 1:59 pm

A denim-printed bathing suit, “The Daytona Dong Sarong Jeado Swim Brief,” is exactly what you don’t need in your burgeoning, sophisticated wardrobe.

The ridiculously tight suit, made to look like denim but actually made of polyester and a bit of spandex, is a speedo-like creation from Shinesty, the company that brought you “wearable aphrodisiacs,” according to Page Six.

The swimwear — again, not actual denim —  is chafe-less, waterproof and fully lined, according to the tabloid, and they go for $39.99 a pop. But, alas, the sarong is only available for pre-order right now and won’t ship until September, giving you no guarantee that it will still be hot enough by then to even use them this season.

If you are unlucky enough to nab a pair in time for a little Labor Day beach action, take note that Shinesty recommends wearing them “paired with caterpillar-style mustaches for optimal results.”

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