If You Give an Obscene Board Game Company a Cookie …

From the makers of Cards Against Humanity — the wonderfully inappropriate card game guaranteed to save 9/10 s*itty parties — comes a fortune cookie company that delivers decidedly horrible omens.

Called OK Cookie, the service delivers a box of 15 terrible prophecies for $10 (plus $5 shipping). 

A few select OK fortunes:

“Your wildest dreams will come true, assuming those dreams are about the extinction of honeybees.”

“You will probably die of a heart attack or something.”

“You will die at an Arby’s in Columbus, Ohio.”

The future for Cards Against Humanity is bright. Besides a recent election-themed card pack, the CAH peeps also just launched their own shipping company, Blackbox. It operates like a co-op — they pair up small businesses to negotiate the best shipping rates for products — and OK Cookie is their first client.

We wish them diabolical, obtuse and non-sequitur fortunes.