I Regret to Inform You That Coors Orange Cream Pop Hard Seltzer Is Utterly Delicious

A refreshing, outrageously good hard seltzer that surpasses all reasonable expectations

August 18, 2021 8:14 am
I Regret to Inform You That Coors Orange Cream Pop Hard Seltzer Is Utterly Delicious
Coors/Tyler Hulett

When I was offered a sample csse of Coors’ new, limited-edition flavor for the summer, “Orange Cream Pop,” I was hesitant. Not because I have any ill feelings towards Coors or its seltzer but because I’m becoming a bit fatigued by our current hard seltzer market and its recent uptick in gimmicky products, which seems to have begun with Four Loko’s completely deranged take on the beverage, which boasts a whopping 14% ABV and an unsurprisingly vile taste. Drinkware brand BrüMate and Crook & Marker released a pickle-flavored hard seltzer this past May, aptly titled Afternoon Dillight. To their credit, these seltzers do pack a pickled punch and would make for a tasty chaser — but that’s about all I could stomach. Just last week, Boston Beer Company and PepsiCo announced the launch of “HARD MTN DEW,” a boozy take on the classic soda. Hearing the news of a seltzer inspired by a creamsicle, I couldn’t help but wonder, who wants this?

Turns out I do. Like, eminently so. When I fantasize about my ideal summer day now, I’m sitting on a beach, burning my skin off and drowning myself in an entire case of Coors Orange Cream Pop Hard Seltzer. And I’m not alone.

When I first had the privledge of tasting this sweet, sweet seltzer for the first time, I forced a friend of mine to take the plunge with me. Both anticipating it would taste like an overly sugary, carbonated mess bound to give us both stomach aches, we sipped only to find a delicious, familiar taste on the other side. We were incredulous. A few weeks later, I brought a few cans to a small get-together where one guest, after taking a few sips, described the seltzer as “life-changing.” Later on, I watched two people fight over the last can.

The Takeout even waxed poetic about the Coors Orange Cream Pop Seltzer in its review last month, while fans of the drink are peppering its listings on online beverage retailors with 5-star reviews and sprightly accolades like: “THE BEST SELTZERS EVER!!’”

So what makes the Coors Orange Cream Pop the best seltzer ever?

Part of it might be that expectations for this seltzer are extremely low. As the Takeout speculated, the flavor may have very well been developed by Coors as a prank that escalated to a limited-time offer. On the other hand, it’s an impressive spot-on imitation. Cracking open a Coors Orange Cream Pop Seltzer makes you feel like you’re peeling open the wrapper of a dripping creamsicle on a sweltering summer day, or twisting the cap off a refreshing, fizzy orange soda. The immediate vanilla aroma is uncanny, but strong and might have you questioning the drink’s level of sweetness. Though somehow the taste is not overwhelmingly sugary. The citrus and vanilla halves are perfectly balanced, while the carbonation lightens everything up, delivering a revitalizing hard seltzer with 4.5% ABV, 90 calories and a pleasantly nostalgic flavor.

The Coors Orange Cream Pop Hard Seltzer’s only con? Its limited-edition status.

When I asked if the seltzer would become a permanent edition to the Coors Seltzer line, as many fans of the seltzer are desperately pleading for, I was told the Coors Orange Cream Pop Seltzer would remain a limited-edition flavor just for summer.

I’m unsure if Coors is fully aware of what they have in their arsenal here. Do they know they’ve formulated one of the best-tasting hard seltzers in an incredibly saturated market right now? I think I speak for all Orange Cream Pop lovers when I say, reconsider Coors! While yes, the flavor pairs unequivocally well with the summertime, if you think for one second I won’t be craving the ambrosial taste of a Coors Orange Cream Pop Seltzer this fall and winter you are sadly mistaken.

If you happen to come across a Coors Orange Cream Pop 12-pack, pick it up and ride out the rest of this summer with the only hard seltzer that matters.

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