How Far Would You Go for an Apartment With Brick Features?

Want the home of your dreams? Fight for it.

By The Editors
April 1, 2016 9:00 am

Appropriating international television franchises for commercial gain is one of the great American traditions.

The Office? England. Deal or No Deal? Holland. Survivor? Sweden.

The latest: Ultimate Ninja Battle: SF, a concept that mashes the popular Japanese program そっくり with good-old American physical challenge shows.

Blood may be spilled. From the casting call: “Blood will definitely be spilled.”

そっくり (literally, “Candy or Not Candy”) is a Japanese TV show in which contestants are challenged to determine (before biting down) if an object was … candy or not candy. The producers have local roots, as evidenced by the fact that the inaugural season will be shot in the Richmond shipyards.

The other half of the competition will comprise a series of punishing physical challenges, including salmon ladders, net crawls and ritualistic self-amputation (or yubitsume, in Yakuza parlance).

Survivors will progress toward the grand prize, a one-bedroom apartment with brick features, communal mail delivery area and laundry (at a shared facility at five minutes’ walk, but featuring your choice of detergents).

Note: Security, first and last, plus guarantor, credit check and references (employer, personal, spiritual) will still be required.

Up for it?

Send your application to the show’s producers via this email with the subject line “Ultimate Ninja Battle SF.”

The only other instructions? “In 50 words or less, tell us what the stupidest thing you’ve ever done for money is.”

Best of luck.


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