Hey, Cheesemonger

By The Editors
September 5, 2013 9:00 am

When you’re 15 years old and still nose-deep in Lunchables, your knowledge of cheese is limited to three basic varieties: mac ‘n’ cheese, grilled cheese and Planter’s Cheez Balls (RIP, homie).

When you’re a man, you should have man-levels of know-what’s-up.

Showing you the whey: the California Cheese Trail app from the folks at the Marin Agricultural Land Trust, available now for iPhone and Android.

This is the app you want to pair with a drive along the Marin Sonoma Cheese Trail — which is a thing.

And it’s the app that’ll help you make the perfect cheese platter. Which every man should attempt, at least before being relegated to dishwashing duty after FUBARing the cheese platter.

About the Marin folks: when they’re not out protecting the rolling farm hills from Snidely-Whiplash-y land developers, they’re upping your cheese IQ (“The hell’s an affineur?”) with their new toolkit for finding farms and tastings.

So, say you’re dropping by Kastania Vineyards for some pinot. A quick consultation with the app’s map will reveal that you’re mere minutes from Cowgirl Creamery and their well-stocked tasting library of curds.

Cheese Trail also offers a (truly) comprehensive index of Cali cheeses, complete with flavor profiles, seasonal availability, production methods and even listings of the shops in which they’re carried.

Easy peasy, very cheesy.

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