60mph. Doesn’t seem like much when you’re driving.

But lying on your back inches above a sheet of solid ice, your quailing nethers may cause you to sing a different tune.

Here to satiate your need for winter speed: the USA Luge Fantasy Camp, now accepting a (very) limited number of bookings.

The camp’s held at the official Olympic Training Center in Lake Placid, where USA Luge recruits and trains Olympian ice sliders — so you’ll be getting medalist treatment. 

Your coach: ‘98 silver medalist Gordy Sheer, who promises a “no BS kind of experience” — get ready to don helmet, goggles, and spandex and take to the same icy death chute the pros use.

Training begins at the “Start House,” where Sheer instructs how to initiate your slide via special spiked gloves. Then it’s off to the track, where you’ll rocket downhill at up to 60mph with only a steel-and-fiberglass sled (and the aforementioned spandex) between you and the ice. 

No brakes.

Lodging’s at the OTC apartments, where you’ll enjoy gourmet grub and where it’s “not uncommon to rub elbows with Olympic stars.”

Try not to challenge anyone to a race.