Bible Study

When you stop and think about your sex life — really ponder, Rodin — what’s preventing you from realizing your true sexual potential?

Besides not having more sex?

Well as the Polish say, that specific problem is not our monkey, not our circus. But if you have a willing partner, may we humbly suggest you make use of this — “The Boudoir Bible,” available for pre-order right now.

Subtitled “The Uninhibited Sex Guide for Today,” this beautifully illustrated tome — scribbles are by a Prada artist, words by a Paris-based “sexual anthropologist” — reveals sexual suggestions, histories, and treatises, from the good-to-know, to the good-to-cross-yourself-first.

To wit:

There’s an erogenous zone called the “Divine P-Spot,” which oddly isn’t where the Pope parks;
Chapters include “The Genital Gym,” “Nipple Tease,” “Male Ejaculation Control,” and “The Anthems of Anal Sex”;
Rope bondage and erotic flagellation can be surprisingly beautiful; and:
“Catherine the Great, the Empress of Russia, dedicated several secret rooms to her sexual endeavors within her palace in Pushkin…”

So now that you know, you should find someone to share that with, too.