Sad Divorced Guy Bill Gates Regrets Palling Around With Jeffrey Epstein

"It was a huge mistake to spend time with him"

Bill Gates speaks on stage. The Microsoft founder recently told Anderson Cooper that he regrets his relationship with Jeffrey Epstein.
And that's why you don't hang out with pedophiles.
Mike Cohen/Getty Images for The New York Times

Billionaire Microsoft founder turned remorseful divorcé Bill Gates has opened up about his recently finalized divorce from Melinda French Gates, and it would seem the grass is not greener on the other side of his marriage. In a recent interview with — who else? — Anderson Cooper, Gates spoke publicly about the dissolution of the 27-year union, striking a more intimate, bereaved tone than the terse public statement we got from when the couple announced their split in May, in which they stated they simply “no longer believe we can grow together as a couple in this next phase of our lives.”

“It’s definitely a very sad milestone,” Gates told Cooper. “Melinda’s a great person and that partnership that we had coming to an end is a source of great personal sadness.”

Among the post-divorce regrets weighing most heavily on the Microsoft founder seems to be his friendship with Jeffrey Epstein, which multiple reports have suggested dealt a significant blow to the marriage. Shortly after the Gateses announced their split earlier this year, reports surfaced claiming Melinda was “uncomfortable” when her husband introduced her to Epstein back in 2013, and the late pedophile is even rumored to have dealt Gates some presumably ill-advised “marriage advice,” which the Microsoft billionaire seems to regret heeding.

“It was a huge mistake to spend time with him, to give him the credibility,” Gates told Cooper of Epstein. “I made a mistake,” he added, explaining that he “had several dinners with [Epstein] hoping that what he said about getting billions of philanthropy for global health through contacts he had might emerge.” When those promises failed to materialize, “that relationship ended,” Gates said.

Unfortunately, that relationship may not have ended swiftly enough for Melinda’s taste. She reportedly began meeting with divorce lawyers back in 2019, which seems to roughly align with public revelations that Gates was one of many high-profile figures caught in Epstein’s massive web of wealthy elites.

So let this be a reminder to men everywhere that female intuition is a real thing. A woman always knows, and if the one you’re married to doesn’t like your friend because he seems like kind of a sociopathic pedophile, maybe just take her word for it. Remember, if you lie down with dogs — or take marriage advice from them — your wife will probably divorce your flea-infested ass.

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