Sub Club

By The Editors
April 1, 2014 9:00 am

If you thought the Bloomberg years were all about the Wall Street-ification of New York, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet:

Introducing LuxeWay, a VC-backed startup bringing members-only luxury subway cars to New York, now accepting applications for a spring 2015 launch.

Yes, that’s right: subway “black cars.”

For an annual fee of “around fifteen thousand dollars” or an as-yet-determined amount of Bitcoin, members will have access to private subway cars serving the 1-2-3 line.

Designed by noted artistes like Julian Schnabel and Philippe Starck, each black car will feature a unique “theme,” e.g., glass-encased vivisections by Damien Hirst or “a ceiling made entirely of lightbulbs” (Ed. note: similar to Schnabel’s installation at the Gramercy Park Hotel).

Every car will include WiFi, a full bar and waitstaff ferrying hors d’oeuvres from noted chefs like Thomas Sätermannen of Brooklyn watertower supper club Vattentorn.

Plus: live musical accompaniment, ranging from pianists tickling baby grands to jazzy trios churning out ragtime hits, as well as “relaxation alcoves” with massage tables and aromatherapy, according to spokesperson Ortega Goetz.

Door policy will be strict, with burly staff on loan from venues like 1OAK and Le Baron checking membership cards before boarding.

“We want to keep things intimate.” says Goetz. “This is how the 1% rides the subway.”

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