Mercedes Has Cornered the Market on Camper Vans for People Who Hate Camper Vans

Next stop Burning Man, brah.

January 23, 2017 9:00 am

Are you considering a luxury ayahuasca retreat? Have you ever posted online about a digital detox you took and how it changed you? Do you take an on-site butler to Burning Man?

Then have we got a treat for you. Following the 2014 release of the Marco Polo and the Marco Polo Activity, Mercedes has added a third camper ride to its overlanding collection with the Marco Polo Horizon.

Let’s review what this adventure mobile will apparently entail.

The Horizon is more about room for activities than multi-day amenities. So while there’s no kitchenette, there is room for 5-8 passengers. Bells and whistles include a trip computer, Mercedes Me Connect Standard services, COMAND Online infotainment and 360-degree cameras. Plus comfortable sleeping space for two, of course.

But have a look at that glorious lifestyle shot that Mercedes is using to promote the ride (above) if you want to know what this van is really about.

Designer fleeces? Check. One cumbersome yet lovely picnic basket filled with a baguette and a couple of fine, hearty reds? Check. One Restoration Hardware lantern? Check. One kumbaya guitar (being played by her, of course, because you know them millennials love it when you flip conventional gender roles on their head)? Double check. 

Which begs a question: Who, exactly, is a $60k camper van with very few practical amenities but plenty of #vibes designed for?

I can tell you, because I know plenty of them.

It’s a van for trustafarians.

Horizon Benz (5 images)

If you’re unfamiliar, a trustafarian is a well-off, typically young socialite (coin courtesy of the ‘rents) who adopts an alternative lifestyle oft riddled with hypocrisy. Like driving your Dodge RAM to a fracking protest. Or tucking your next-gen smartphone into a homemade sarong. Yes, this is a person. A person who exists because sometimes you just have to say, “F*ck it, Emma. Let’s skip the vaccines rally tonight, hit Whole Foods and get out of the city. Whadaya say, babe?”

And for $55,700, the Horizon is that person’s huckleberry.

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