6 Essential Super Bowl Secrets
No. 5: How to take your friends’ money
It’s Super Bowl time again and, though our spirits are more deflated than Belichick’s balls, we owe it to God, country and (former InsideHook cover girl) Charlotte McKinney commercials to enjoy the game. Here’s how to host like a man.
1. Just go with it
San Francisco isn’t exactly known for Super Bowl enthusiasm. But let’s not be communists. This is America. Hosting the party means you get to hold the remote control, plus there’s no schlepping home after the game.
2. Make the knee-highs disappear
Make your friends’ (and your own) day by arranging on-site, out-of-sight kid-minding with nanny-on-demand service UrbanSitter.
3. Tidy up
Better yet, pay someone else to tidy up for you. Still better yet, arrange a pre- and post-party clean-up with the Homejoy app, minimizing your total effort to a couple taps.
For the menu, think next-level upgrades of game-day classics. Postmates will deliver the city’s best wings, from Hot Sauce and Panko. Order a large of the Kentucky-yaki (Kentucky bourbon and teriyaki), sticky pepper garlic, Korean fried and Winnie’s orange Sriracha. Supplement this with Kalua pork and Marin Sun Farms’ grass-fed beef sliders from Slider Shack ($200 minimum order, delivery included).
Bi-Rite can deliver six packs of local beers (Trumer Pilsner from Berkeley, Racer 5 from Healdsburg, and our very own Anchor Steam) to your home. Or let a pro handle the whole thing, with bartender service and your choice of booze, via the Saucey app.
6. Place your bets
Once you’ve plied your pals with a beer or six, take their money. We dialed Case Keefer — sports beat reporter at The Las Vegas Sun — and asked him which prop bets he likes best. Three to put your ducats behind:
Take the under on Gronk’s receiving yards (79.5). “He is averaging 10 less than that on the season, and he hasn’t played a defense like Seattle’s.”
Take Lebron James’s points scored v. the Timberwolves (-3.5) over Tom Brady’s completed passes. Rationale: the Timberwolves can’t play D; the Legion of Boom can.
Take the under on total kickoff returns (5.5; excludes touchbacks). “Sharps (pro bettors, in Vegas parlance) pounded the under here. Expect good conditions and few mistakes.”
Once the final whistle blows, collect your funds and send ‘em packing.