News & Opinion | May 1, 2019 12:54 pm

America’s Next President Should Be a Bartender

A good bartender is well-versed in many of the skills required to hold office

bartender president
Any good politician has a lot in common with a good bartender
Johann Trasch/Unsplash

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Organized, prepared, quick-thinking, skilled in time management and problem-solving, diplomatic and charismatic. These are qualities most people would like to see in a political leader. They are also, according to David Wondrich at The Daily Beast, qualities you’re likely to find in any good bartender.

In a recent article, the outlet argued that bartending is excellent training for anyone seeking political office. While bartending like many service industry jobs is often mistaken for and misrepresented as a low-level occupation for unskilled workers, the article examined the demands of the profession, painting it as one in which only highly skilled and diligent individuals find success.

Detailing the tasks a bartender would have to undertake in order to fill an average six-drink order, the article outlined a complex twenty-step process just to get the drinks prepared and served, all in under five minutes or so. “A good bartender has to be an on-the-fly systems engineer, able to hear an order and instantly diagram out a process that will quickly and efficiently result in the requested drinks all lined up on the bar and in peak condition,” wrote the outlet.

A bartender also has to be familiar with a vast body of knowledge, including hundreds of recipes and an understanding of the ingredients in, and origins of, a wide variety of alcohols and ingredients.

Meanwhile, as a customer service provider, it’s not enough for bartenders to simply be skilled and silent. As Wondrich notes, bartenders are expected to entertain and engage with customers if those customers are so inclined, which amounts to “the equivalent of holding a conversation while working out a word problem.”

All this, says Wondrich, results in a person who is “exceptionally quick-thinking, obsessively well-prepared, organized, curious, and diplomatic, but also decisive.” Doesn’t sound like such a bad person to have in office.