By this time tomorrow, it’ll all be over (the election and possibly the world as we know it, results pending).
Might as well spend the final hours in the company of likeminded people. And booze. Lots of it.
Hence, we’ve compiled a list of the 16 best places in town to watch Wolf Blitzer excitedly point at a map, as based on your desired viewing environment.
Without further ado, here’s where to watch if you …
Would Prefer That Election Results Are Observed With $5 Nachos and Craft Beers: Laughing Monk
If You're Sick of All This and Just Want Some Sports: Ted’s
Are Scared: Under your bed. (Pick up supplies at Cask!)
Want to Celebrate Alongside a Gay Community That Is Under No Circumstances Going Back in Time: Midnight Sun, “the Castro’s Election Headquarters”
Don’t Want to Remember the Results in the Morning: The Great Northern
Have a Taco Because It’s Tuesday: Nick’s Crispy Tacos
Not Actually Know What’s Happening: Young Urban Zen
Eat an Ethnic Food That May Not Be Authentically Available This Time Next Month: Helmand Palace
Watch Amateur Comedians Make Everyone Nervous With Armchair Commentary: Pianofight’s Election Night Special
Meet Someone You Can Marry for Citizenship in Another Country: Atelier Crenn
Want to Grab Women by the P*ssy: Literally nowhere ever.
Drink Somewhere That Has No Walls: SoMa StrEat Food Park’s Election Day Watch Party
Be Unsure If Everyone Around You Has or Voted the Same Way as You: Anywhere Peter Thiel’s drinking
You’re Really Gonna Move to Canada: Salt House (They have poutine!)
You Need Small Food for Your Small Hands: Picaro
Need to Sing Your Election Blues Away: Bow Bow