TV | January 6, 2021 1:19 pm

There’s a New Children’s Show About a Man With a Giant, Uncontrollable Penis

Comically large genitalia, but make it a kids' show

John Dillermand's penis actually seems to be much longer and more dextrous than this eggplant, but you get the idea.
Richard Clark/Getty Images

Apparently there’s a new TV show in Denmark about a man named John Dillermand, who has a giant penis. As far as I can tell, this appears to be the whole premise of the show. Dillermand — which roughly translates to “penis man” — uses his giant penis to accomplish tasks, such as creating murals, stealing ice cream from children and even performing daring rescue missions. Sounds pretty weird, but did I mention this is also an animated children’s show?

According to the Guardian, the Danish series about a man and his extraordinarily long penis is aimed at children between the ages of four and eight. Naturally, this has raised a few eyebrows, sparking a debate over when and if genitalia is an appropriate subject for a children’s TV show.

On the one hand, there are those who argue a man with a giant, uncontrollable penis might send the wrong message to children about consent. “It’s perpetuating the standard idea of a patriarchal society and normalizing ‘locker room culture,’” said Christian Groes, an associate professor and gender researcher at Roskilde University. “It’s meant to be funny — so it’s seen as harmless. But it’s not. And we’re teaching this to our kids.”

There are others who have come to Dillermand’s defense, however, arguing that children can identify with the character and maybe even learn a thing or two from Dillermand and his dick. “The show depicts a man who is impulsive and not always in control, who makes mistakes — like kids do, but crucially, Dillermand always makes it right. He takes responsibility for his actions,” said clinical psychologist Erla Heinesen Højsted. “When a woman in the show tells him that he should keep his penis in his pants, for instance, he listens. Which is nice. He is accountable.”

Meanwhile, some argue that children should have access to material about their bodies, and that a show about an oversized penis is not necessarily sexual in nature. “This is categorically not a show about sex,” said Højsted. “To pretend it is projects adult ideas on it.”

Moreover, as the network behind the program maintained in its response to the latest criticism, the most important thing is that children enjoy John Dillermand, and it seems the kids do in fact enjoy the penis man. After all, as Højsted put it, “kids do find genitals funny.”

So I guess that settles it.