The Internet Is Cleansing Itself of “Cuomosexual” Merch
The reign of the Cuomosexuals is over
Some of us may recall that the earliest days of the COVID-19 pandemic were strangely, even alarmingly horny. For some, this reckless, fear-struck horniness included inappropriately sexualizing public figures at the forefront of the pandemic, including Dr. Anthony Fauci — who even got a nomination for People’s Sexiest Man of the Year out of it — and, more regrettably, then-Governor Andrew Cuomo. Those who were stroking it, literally or metaphorically, to Cuomo declared themselves “Cuomosexuals,” and naturally, cheeky Cuomosexual merchandise swiftly followed.
Had Andrew Cuomo not gone on to find himself at the center of a sexual harassment scandal that culminated in his resignation as governor of New York yesterday, we all probably would’ve quietly agreed to just sort of look the other way and let the whole “Cuomosexual” thing be written off as a weird relic of a weird time no one needs to bother revisiting. Unfortunately for the Cuomosexuals, that’s not what happened, and in the wake of the allegations against the former governor and his subsequent resignation, those who publicly identified with Cuomosexuality are being called out for their embarrassingly bad judgment, and their merchandise is being stripped from the internet.
Online sellers who rushed to capitalize on the Cuomosexual trend during its height in the seemingly innocent early days of the pandemic have confirmed to the New York Times that they’re pulling their merch in light of recent events, taking “Cuomosexual” T-shirts, mugs, totes and even $400 cashmere sweaters off the market.
“When I created and decided to sell these items, it was meant to be lighthearted and I never thought he would be accused of such outrageous behavior,” one seller told the Times, while another said he pulled his merchandise as soon as he became aware of the allegations. “I have no interest in promoting or being associated with that type of behavior,” he said, adding that he continued to receive orders for Cuomosexual merch even after the allegations broke.
Others, however, have made the bizarre and probably ill-advised decision to stand by their Cuomosexual identity. “I definitely was a ‘Cuomosexual’ in that moment,” filmmaker Kely Nascimento-DeLuca told the Times, adding that while she wouldn’t align herself with Cuomosexuality today, the movement “represented a moment in time.”
It did indeed represent a moment in time, but as we’ve established, that moment was an embarrassing, regrettable one that would be embarrassing and regrettable even if Cuomo’s sexual misconduct hadn’t come to light. Anyway, the lesson is, maybe don’t bend over backwards to sexualize a man in power, because there’s probably a decent chance he’ll turn out to be a sexual predator.
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