People online are, not to sugarcoat it, pretty livid after a clip from the reality TV dating show Love Is Blind went viral this weekend. It features cast members Chris and Jessica engaged in a conversation that pretty much ended their relationship — for understandable reasons.
Chris essentially tells Jessica, who is an infectious diseases physician at a hospital, that she does not have the kind of body type that he’s “used to.”
“It’s just, like, somebody who does fucking pilates every day or someone who’s working out everyday,” he says. “In those situations, it’s hard for me to be physically, like when we’re in that moment, into it.”
If you’re not familiar with the show Love Is Blind, it’s kind of like the reality singing competition show The Voice. Singles spend 10 days talking without ever seeing the person they’re talking to via soundproof “pods.” To be clear: You literally have no idea what the person looks like until you get to see them 10 days later. It’s all about an attempt fostering the emotional connection before the physical one — ironic!
After the 10 days, couples are only allowed to meet each other if they get engaged. Then, they spend three weeks living together to see if they’re still compatible before making a final decision at the wedding.
All this to say, there’s clearly more context that’s missing from the video about this couple in particular. They had a promising start chemistry-wise, supposedly having a pretty strong emotional connection with one another very quickly. But it abruptly ended after Christ ghosted her for 48 hours and made their first conversation after the fact…this one. He created an even bigger mess for himself after that, revealing some not-so-good-looking true colors.
Naturally, a lot about this has been posted online.
On one hand, is there anything wrong with having a type? Last summer, Tinder introduced a height filter that allowed women to filter their preferences for men based on their height. Height has been a widely debated subject when it comes to dating, and while some men had responses to it that were, say, a little out of hand, there isn’t anything ultimately wrong with having certain preferences.
Does it make someone shallow if it comes from a place of vanity? Maybe! One of the most common criticisms circulating online is the entire way this was communicated by Chris — especially considering how interested he and Jessica initially seemed in each other. I find it rather mean to sleep with someone and then tell them on television that they’re just not attractive enough for you.
In a recent interview with Entertainment Weekly, Chris admitted to not communicating his thoughts better — in a rather deflective way, if you ask me — with “a little more empathy.”
A lot of this fallout could have been prevented, for example, had this guy communicated very early on, in the depths of the “pods,” that he preferred someone who lived a very active lifestyle because he’s also very into fitness or whatever.
Let this all just be a lesson that reminds us of multiple things: communication is important, don’t pursue relationships with people you don’t think you could be attracted to and don’t go on a reality TV show where the entire point is that you have to be open-minded about appearances.
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