Just recently, I wrote an article about rage bait. Not just rage bait as an idea, but a particular kind of rage bait going around on TikTok. It was a selection of pretty controversial questions women were asking their male partners to…insight rage. But it was also being used as a love test, much like the whole “would you still love me if I was a worm” ordeal. It makes you roll your eyes, but you give an answer that your partner would still appreciate, whether it’s begrudgingly or not.
This time, there are no questions. Only actions. Particularly one action, and there’s not even a moment to back out before it happens. Enter: The “spit up milk on your partner to see if they’re ready for a baby” challenge.
This man immediately freezes, stands up and gives his girlfriend a little bit of side eye.
This guy does it on his “emetophobic wife,” who screams and gets up immediately.
It goes exactly as it sounds: People are taking big swigs of milk, innocently lying on their partners and spitting up the milk in their mouth all over them, like they’re babies spitting up.
This woman didn’t even notice at first, but she immediately froze once she did. Their dog also begins to lick it off her, which did get a laugh out of me. Yet, maybe don’t be like this guy who did this challenge while his girlfriend was lying on her $200 blanket.
Many are finding this absolutely hilarious — and they’re often taking it as a somewhat legitimate indicator depending on how they react: If the partner on the receiving end reacts calmly, even touching the spit up directly or their partner’s mouth without getting clearly disturbed, people are sharing their positive observations and analysis. I’ve seen comments on videos ranging from “i believe the patience is there” to “his reaction low-key a green flag tho” to “That man is ready to be your husband.”
People are testing it outside of their relationships, too, with a “testing my mom’s motherly instincts since I’m home from college” test. I’ll give this one a volume warning in case you’re listening with headphones.
Or a “spitting up on my dad to see if he misses me being a baby” test. He’s suspicious from the beginning and pushes his daughter right off him. I can’t blame him; he was already in bed when it happened.
If everyone’s able to have a good laugh about it, that’s all that matters. To me, the catch here is that arguably a baby spitting up on someone is vastly different than a grown adult. This is just…kinda gross, and there are likely other ways to test this, like talking to your partner instead of releasing spit milk on them.
Regardless, you can’t deny that many of the people on TikTok love a good relationship prank/test/quiz wrapped all into one. The “bird test” is another one that recently resurfaced on the app, where one partner tells the other that they “saw a bird today” — something that’s mundane and an every day occurrence — and the other person in the couple is supposed to ideally ask follow-up questions and seem curious, going along with the partner’s excitement over the bird spotting.
We, as a society, continue to put ourselves in these silly situations to let people on the internet decide whether or not our partners are good enough, especially considering that they can often cause more harm than good. I know myself well enough to know that I would inevitably have a terrible reaction to something like this because I hate anything related to throwing up.
So, do I think any of these tests are the ultimate, definitive relationship test? No. But I suppose some people are finding success here, so congrats, I guess. Please just don’t let this be the reason milk prices go up.
Meet your guide
More Like This
This article appeared in an InsideHook newsletter. Sign up for free to get more on travel, wellness, style, drinking, and culture.
