One of the benefits of being a person who writes about sex on the internet is that you tend to accumulate a lot of sex toys. One of the drawbacks is that you tend to accumulate far more sex toys than your average person who writes about sex on the internet likely has space to store in their probably tiny New York City apartment. Fortunately, Miley Cyrus has a simple solution: use your sex toys for home decor.
During a recent appearance on SiriusXM’s Barstool Sports radio show, the pop star shared her unique approach to home decorating, explaining how she turns her sex toys into multifunctional pieces that double as ornamental knick-knacks.
“I like sex toys,” Cyrus said on the radio show. “I buy them for myself, but I end up using them for interior design. Sex and interior design go actually hand in hand.”
While Cyrus, a presumably very wealthy superstar, probably has more than enough space in any of her various dwellings to store a sex toy collection larger than god’s own pleasure chest, her home-decor hack proves a useful solution for those of us struggling to keep our growing stockpile of sex toys stashed away in tiny apartments. Clearly, we’ve had it all wrong. Rather than trying to keep our toys hidden out of sight in our own bedrooms like high schoolers, we should make like Miley and simply put them on display like the feats of aesthetic design they are. With a little imagination, dildos can become decorative house plants, whips can double as the kind of kitschy wall decor you’d see at a BDSM-themed version of a chain restaurant, and cock rings are just begging to be hung on the Christmas tree (keep that in mind for next year).
Anyway, if anyone needs me, I’ll be redecorating.
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