Just say no to the jersey. You're a grown man.
Just say no to the jersey. You're a grown man.
By Tanner Garrity / September 4, 2019 9:10 am

The NFL season officially kicks off Thursday night at Soldier Field. We can’t tell you who’s going to win the Super Bowl (the Patriots), or who’s going to win your fantasy league (not you), but we can help you find some go-to threads for the many weeks ahead.

Before we get started, there are two simple rules to observe when it comes to buying gear for your favorite team, and they apply especially to the NFL:

  1. Don’t buy a jersey. You’re a grown man, and based on some of these new hires, you’re probably even older than your favorite team’s coach, let alone the player whose name is on your back.
  2. Cherish whatever you buy. You’re not in middle school and wearing team-emblazoned garb every day of the week. Pick one thing and wear it into the ground.

What that in mind, we curated our single favorite piece of gameday apparel for all 32 teams below. From wacky tees to trucker hats to a $600 jacket, it’s all in here.

Arizona Cardinals

Hopefully the addition of Kyler Murray will make this franchise a bit more exciting … and lead to some more inspired apparel. We don’t mind this half-zip from Tommy Bahama as a tailgating go-to, though.

Atlanta Falcons

Don’t sleep on caps for NFL teams, they’re always a refreshing look. We like this mesh trucker from ’47 Brand.

Baltimore Ravens

The Ravens’ colors are unceasingly indecipherable, and that extends to their apparel, too. Keep it simple with this state-pride long sleeve in black and purple.

Buffalo Bills

Remembering a happier time up in chilly Buffalo.

Carolina Panthers

This water-resistant anorak with a high-collared hood and cinched sleeves and waist is the perfect Sunday solution in a state that can be rather wet around this time of year.

Chicago Bears

Hometown brand Chitown Clothing churns out a ton of whimsical Windy City apparel. You’ll want to start here.

Cincinnati Bengals

Ohio-based Homage makes a bevy of offensively soft tees and sweatshirts, mostly in support of Rust Belt teams. Here’s one of their better Bengals options.

Cleveland Browns

Also from Homage, this minimalist sweatshirt proves that sometimes no logo is the best logo.

Dallas Cowboys

We’ll make an exception to the no-jersey rule for this long-sleeve crewneck honoring the NFL’s all-time leading rusher.

Denver Broncos

Some pieces are so ugly they pass into “flair” territory. This Broncos hoodie fits the bill.

Detroit Lions

A great look from Mitchell & Ness, which makes elevated sports apparel inspired by vintage designs. We love those stripes at the end of each sleeve.

Green Bay Packers

Far and away the most expensive piece here, but if you’re at Lambeau eight times a year you might as well take the plunge. You will legitimately have this for the rest of your life.

Houston Texans

Houston label Running Game makes a ton of tees for local teams. They have to get creative considering they don’t exactly have licensing in place, so you end up with cool designs like the one above.

Indianapolis Colts

Chins up, Colts fans. Jacoby Brissett isn’t that bad, and neither is the football-playing horse on this shirt.

Jacksonville Jaguars

One of the stranger teams to shop for in the league. The color scheme doesn’t go with much of anything, so we prefer a piece in black or grey.

Kansas City Chiefs

If the goal is to be sitting in Arrowhead in late January, you best be ready to keep your dome warm with this knit hat from New Era.

Los Angeles Chargers

Are San Diegans still rooting for the Chargers? In the interest of keeping things civil along the Cali coastline, here’s a neutral tee from ’47 Brand.

Los Angeles Rams

It gets pretty damn sunny in the Coliseum.

Miami Dolphins

Mitchell & Ness has released pieces like this over the years, and we’re big fans. The “baseball v-neck” for teams in other leagues is a way more flattering look than swimming in a massive football jersey.

Minnesota Vikings

For obvious reasons.

New England Patriots

We’d tell you not to cut the sleeves off of it but we know you’re gonna do it anyway.

New Orleans Saints

This look is all business. Very Brees.

New York Giants

Pretty much the only respect the Giants have left hinges on their sterling history. This old-school crew should help recall those halcyon Lombardian days.

New York Jets

Those new uniforms are ridiculous. So opt for something with the old logo.

Oakland Raiders

Similar to the Chargers situation — we’re not sure how many Oakland-based fans plan to keep rooting for the Raiders after their Vegas move. This Nike sweatshirt covers the bases by omitting the city name.

Philadelphia Eagles

A dark look for a deeply disturbed city.

Pittsburgh Steelers

Another wacky design from Homage, which has a few looks for Steelers faithful.

San Francisco 49ers

The 49ers have one of the most iconic sets in the league, and this sweatshirt does its colors and lines justice.

Seattle Seahawks

The eyes deserve a rest from all the Seahawk neon once in a while. This Anorak does the job, and will keep you dry at CenturyLink.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers

One of the few places where you can wear an Aloha shirt all year, so why wouldn’t you?

Tennessee Titans

It’s Nashville. Have a day.

Washington Redskins

As respectable as one can hope for here.

Nota bene: If you buy through the links in this article, InsideHook may earn a small share of the profits.