Gentlemen, a fearsome storm bears down.
A storm with the terrifying power of a cartoon fish.
But you can show Nemo who's boss with Kite Club NY — now offering snowkiting lessons just a couple hours north of the city.
Snowkiting is basically kiteboarding — you’re strapped into a harness and a snowboard (or skis), and the wind pulls you across frosty terrain, from frozen lakes to snowy fields.
All at over 15mph.
Kite Club runs three-hour classes, which cover the full gamut: safety, basic kite theory, launching, and positioning.
Both individual and group lessons are available, and Kite Club can arrange day trips via bus.
Though in the climatically catastrophic future, snowkiting may actually be the only viable method of transportation.