Don't Trust Your Child Not to Kill Itself? Try an In-Ground Trampoline.

Need a less dorky alternative to those enclosure jobbies?

By Evan Bleier

 
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15 February 2017

Trampoline enclosures: let's talk about 'em.

Namely, about the fact that until a couple decades ago, they did not exist. This was back in the Days of Learning the Hard Way. If an intrepid young bouncer did not have the requisite motor skills to keep himself within the designated bouncing area of a trampoline, he Learned the Hard Way.

Then, at some point, people stopped believing in Learning the Hard Way. It was around this point that the trampoline enclosure was born.

Forutnately, there exists a better and less embarrassing way to make sure your kids don't break their assbones. It's called Trampolines Down Under, producer of circular, in-ground trampolines that feature retaining walls, galvanized springs and a patented vented safety pad system that allows air to escape during bouncing sessions. Designed to resist the elements, the 14-foot trampolines go for $1,659 a pop and ship free.

All that said, we won't call Child Services on you should you choose to erect your tramp the old-fashioned way and make your children Learn the Hard Way.

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