Yes, SF: Jackson Hole, Wyoming. It’s only a two-hour flight away.
And no one does après-ski luxury quite like Jackson Hole. Not in America, anyway (hi, Gstaad).
After all, it’s hard to down a post-schuss beer without seeing the likes of Brad Pitt, Matthew McConaughey, Adam Sandler, or part-time resident Harrison Ford.
Not to mention: five-star resorts. Lots of five-star resorts.
But at its heart, Jackson is a town for serious skiers. It’s arguably the most beautiful ski town in North America and offers just enough beginner trails to keep a newbie busy.
Here’s where we suggest you stay and eat.
If you’re going to blow the bank, do it at Amangani, the first U.S. offering from super-luxe brand Aman Resorts.
After skiing and snowboarding, head back to the hotel for family-friendly activities like dog-sledding and wildlife safaris — or just take in the views of the Grand Tetons from the open-air heated pool.
Walk to the tram from Teton Mountain Lodge & Spa, take the aerial ride 10,000 feet up, and then come right back down for the best après scene in town, at the hotel’s Spur Restaurant — where executive chef Kevin Humphreys serves sage and walnut spaetzle, glazed venison and buffalo sliders.
DINNER FOR TWO
The Bird’s not fancy, but this burger place five miles out of town defines “getting away from it all” — not least because management actively discourages kids (“There are drunk people with fragile glass staggering around”). They’ll even drive you home if you get too deep into the drinks menu.
DINNER FOR 200
Come to the Mangy Moose for the crowd, not the food — because the truffle fries and baby back ribs are good, but the people watching is great. Show up early if you want to even get a look at a seat.
In short: a comfy skier is a happy skier. And lift tickets ain’t cheap. So invest in gear that’ll keep you on the hill and cruising the slopes — warmly.
A HUD that let’s you do everything from track your speed to control your music to check text messages. The future is now.
If you’re not wearing a helmet, you’re now officially in the minority. And an idiot. And you may die. This one: nearly weightless with a super low profile for decreased mushroom head.
The exact amount of jacket you need. Lightweight, great range of motion without being bulky, and so warm you can literally wear a T-shirt under it most days.
“Bib” = snow suspenders = increased warmth and decreased slouch factor. Plus they’re removable for warmer spring days.
Whether you’re gearing up for a day on the hill, decompressing afterward, or just living vicariously through snow-sliding daredevils, these are the flicks you should be doing it with.
The riveting feature-length documentary chronicling the life of extreme skier and action sports pioneer Shane McConkey, from his childhood ski-racing beginnings all the way up to his death in a tragic wingsuiting accident in 2009.
Snowboard films have dropped since, but Red Bull’s eye-popping chronicle of professional lunatic Travis Rice’s global aerial jaunts remains the genre’s pinnacle. If this trailer doesn’t give you goosebumps, skip the doctor and see a mortician, because you are clinically dead.
Picking a favorite from ski film legend Warren Miller’s 65-flick-deep oeuvre is tough, but Fifty wins out for featuring footage from the first half century of trips to everywhere from Austria to Ecuador in search of deep powder and people eating it off of ski lifts.
To put it bluntly, this recent stylistic throwback to ski flicks of the ‘70s is worth downloading for no reason other than the fact that it features the greatest naked ski segment ever recorded.
A man who knows his jargon shall never a gaper (see below) be. Edify thyself to avoid ridicule.
Bony: Used to describe terrain with exposed obstacles such as small trees/roots, usually resulting from low snowfall.
Gaper: A skier/snowboarder who is largely clueless, oblivious, and in the way. Known to sport jester hats, fur, ridiculously embroidered coat/pants. For examples, see @jerryoftheday.
Pizza: Skis with tips together = slows you down.
French Fries: Skis parallel = speeds you up.
Pow: Short for “powder”: light, (ideally) untracked snow considered by any non-gaper to be ideal skiing/snowboarding conditions. Syn.: Pillows, Freshies.
Yard Sale: A wipeout resulting in gear (skis, poles, hat, goggles, etc) strewn haphazardly about the crash site.
Knuckle Dragger: Derogatory term used by skiers to describe snowboarders. Syn.: Slowboarder, Scrape Ape.
Two Planker: Derogatory term used by snowboarders to describe skiers. Syn: Prick on Sticks, Troll with Poles.
Tourist Trap: A confluence of two or more green runs. Avoid after 2:00 P.M.
Moguls: Large humps of snow on advanced slopes created by skier turns. No there is nothing underneath them.
Groomer/Corduroy: A run “groomed” by snowcats overnight, yielding a mogul-free slope with the texture of corduroy pants. Great for beginners and intermediates.