Apple said it took “courage” to ditch the headphone jack.
Know what takes even more courage? Rocking a MobileMan S1, a wearable Bluetooth speaker that is being sold as a “hands-free, ears-free, weatherproof and comfortable” solution to your new headphone issues.
Basically, it’s a wireless speaker masquerading as a weight vest.
Depending on the model, the speakers are either housed in lycra and neoprene (the Sport model) or synthetic leather and neoprene (the “Premium” edition).
Aimed at the fitness crowd — one that apparently likes bothering other people — the S1 is water resistant and features reflective straps for day- and nighttime annoyance. It’s a light seven oz. and has a battery life up to 10 hours.
It also features a multi-in mic — so you can yell on the phone while you exercise, we guess — and a flexible utility pocket to house small items. Like, say, a knife to fend off the hundreds of people glaring at you and your boombox pack.
Ironic side note: the S1 does have a headphone jack.