San Francisco is the testing ground for a generation of entrepreneurs doing their best to ensure we never have to fix a faucet — or wait for coffee, buy a grocery, send a package, or do basically anything — ever again. Here, a guide to outsourcing your entire day in the app-for-anything, post-Uber world.
Avoid walking your dog: Wag will send over a screened dog handler, who'll supply a report card and "bathroom report." Bonus: 10 cents of every mile walked supports the Best Friends Animal Society, an organization supporting homeless pets.
Avoid standing in line for breakfast: Postmates can deliver basically anything, including Starbucks coffee and oatmeal. Add a Green Ginger from Project Juice on Valencia.
Avoid a million hours of Internet research on a new bike: Rent/test-drive a replacement on Spinlister, where a 24-speed Fuji road bike is $15 a day or a Tarmac Pro is $100.
Avoid spending 30 minutes moving your car to a legal space: Zirx is the best in a crowded places. They'll do with your ride whatever you need: park it, gas it up, even change your oil.
Avoid having to clean your own kitchen: Homejoy offers both a standard service — clothes folded, trash emptied, floors mopped — as well as add-ons like a thorough cleansing of your fridge and oven.
Avoid the word "laundry": Washio picks up and delivers next-day.
Avoid throwing an Allen wrench at your wall: Handy will come over and build (or fix) your IKEA purchase.
Avoid Target: Google Shopping Express can deliver a toaster, shower curtain and tens of thousands of other things that normally involve a check-out line.
Avoid the grocery store: Good Eggs delivers produce and pantry goods. Downside: no Diet Coke.
Avoid skipping lunch: Sprig now delivers its limited yet very delicious selection of meals for lunch or dinner. Yesterday it was pulled pork, tequila lime shrimp salad or soba salmon "served ambient."
Avoid the doghouse: BloomThat delivers great-looking bouquets on-demand.
Avoid going to the post office ever again: Shyp makes buying online — and returning what you don't like — easier, since it no longer involves a schlep to the post office.
Avoid a girlfriend who you no longer want to be your girlfriend: The League (rolling out now) promises a better quality of match.
Avoid the same-old at dinnertime: The daily-changing menu at Bento means a new take on Asian food every night.
Avoid an empty bar cart: Saucey supplies alcohol on demand.
Avoid stress in a healthy manner: Unwind Me matches your too-tight shoulders with a therapist who'll make house calls. Have a look at their bios before booking; no tips necessary.