Home & Design | May 31, 2016 9:00 am

What Will $1M Get You in SF Real Estate?

Russian Hill v. Actual Russia Edition

Everyone has an S.F. property nightmare — whether it’s an actual, recurring nightmare, or just that time you had to pack up and move to Daly City. But there are also dreams to be had out there. Hence: our monthly roundup of five of the area’s top-line properties, all currently up for grabs.

Step 1) Get a million bucks. Or five, or 10.

Step 2) Buy a dacha in Russia. Or a 2BR in Russian Hill.

It’s the premise of a game we like to play. First we ask “What can a million (or two, or five) really buy around here?”

Then we ask: “Now what if we spent that same amount in Moscow, Rio, Paris or elsewhere?”

Sometimes we score. Other times it’s a draw (looking at you, London).

The choice is yours.

735 Geary Street #202
“Lower Nob Hill”

For (very) roughly a half-mill, you can have this Geary Street 1 bed/1 bath with period details, including some killer mouldings and a genuinely exceptional circular bedroom. It’s 822 square feet with a bus line “right outside,” which is one way of describing the experience of living directly above Geary. Shared laundry and garden.

Or, for about the same price: a three-bedroom apartment overlooking leafy Place Burq in Amelie’s Montmartre, with easy access to the metro, double east-west exposure, and views of Sacre Coeur and the Eiffel Tower immediately outside.

1522 29th Avenue
Outer Sunset

You’re halfway to the ocean. It might not make the design mags with its innovative architecture, but this is a well-appointed, recently remodeled three-bedroom with a sweet backyard and plenty of space for a family.

Or, for just about the same price — in one of the world’s other really horrible housing markets — please see this three-bedroom house in London’s N11. The location is disadvantageous (Welcome to Zone 4!), but you will, in keeping with English tastes, have a spacious garden all to yourself.

51 Arbor Street
Glen Park

You wanted views? You wanted five bedrooms? You wanted an expanse of Carrara marble? This guy’s got it, plus a great garden, two-car garage and a ton of space in the bedroom.

For just a few dollars/rubles more, you might consider this five-room “luxury” apartment in Moscow. Fully furnished, underground parking and lots of security features. Plus: Miele kitchen!

2415 Bay Street

You really can’t beat the location, almost directly across from the Palace of Fine Arts. Inside, you’ll find a wealth of Edwardian design details, four bedrooms, and some of the best views we’ve ever seen from an expansive, wraparound deck.

For about the same price, you could also get this in Sydney, the city that gets the “world’s worst housing market” award when we (or Hong Kong) haven’t won it ourselves. Here, you’ll find your choice of “ideal grand home, office or boutique redevelopment” — it’s like a housing choose-your-own-adventure.

2600 Lyon Street
Pacific Heights

This is a five-bed, five-bath pistachio dream with views around the bay and up to Marin. Tons of light, an enclosed sundeck, and a super dramatic entryway — plus quite possibly the best facade in all of the city.

It’s actually impossible to find a $10 million house in Dublin proper, one of the world’s most affordable housing markets — so instead, we’ll suggest this downright regal Arts and Crafts-style estate billed as “one of the finest houses in County Dublin.”