Gear | July 1, 2016 9:00 am

How Much Would You Pay for the Stealth Bomber of Blenders?

A blender that can change lives? Prove it.

“It’s more than just a blender — it can change your life.”

An unusual claim, but Blendtec may have done it.

The creators of “the world’s most advanced blenders” just released their Professional 800 WildSide Blender, which features “Stealth technology.”

… and a $1,050 price tag.

With that, though, you get quite the machine. The sealed soundproof design operates 360 degrees around the jar, giving you a potent mixer at the sound levels of normal conversation.

Nice specs, too: 11 speeds, 3.8-HP motor, illuminated touch control with manual speed slider and a whopping 42 preprogrammed blend cycles (plus USB connectivity that pairs with an online “Blend Wizard” for creating more, because why not?).

It’s already inspired a few early rave reviews on Amazon … and a bit of worthy sarcasm:

This is an excellent, completely silent blender. I plan on purchasing four more for installation in the servants’ quarters. My petulant help sneak into the kitchen and make margaritas at night, but they claim it’s the garbage disposal when confronted about the noise. With their own Blendtec Pro 800 with WildSide Jars to use, I won’t be woken up every time one of them needs to escape from their dismal reality.

Now, Blendtec does offer the opportunity to pay for these luxe mixers for a “low” monthly fee of $97 (hooray?).

If you don’t want the blender, but do want to see Blendtec in action, we suggest checking out founder Tom Dickson’s YouTube series called “Will It Blend?”, where he offers up the likes of Apple Watches and iPhones to his company’s powerful cutters.

Now that’s a worthy mix.